Life is like a TV show

I feel super unprepared for the new year.

2011 has been much better than 2010 although there are also ups an downs.

Praying 2012 will be even better.

What are my goals for next year?

Do I look so strong that many wouldnt think that I can be really down or reach my threshold for certain things?

你们真的太看得起我了. Many times, my appearance of strength is truly to hide whats weak inside. I hide many things too well that many may not know the true me. But I do.

I maybe laughing with joy but its just a mask to cover the real me. I only started experiencing true joy when I came to know Him.

I realise I'm not as strong as what I think I am to be. I realise I do have weak point towards certain matters.


Am I taking it too personally? Maybe like what someone says "take it easy."

Am I expecting too much of myself or I'm really not cut out for it? Someone else once told me "dont be too hard on yourself. Take things slowly."

Already I feel I cant cope with this little load. How much more can I if I want to do more?

Cry.

Omg.. I can't believe it. >_<

I hope I have not caused the start of anything unpleasant. *cross fingers*

Listening to a radio now.

Wish I'm chilling out at a pub with a live band now. Cool breeze blowing as we sit there, sip some beer, catch up and enjoy the moment. As simple as that.

Wish I could catch some movies too. Best if I'm not alone. Superb if I'm with someone whom I can share the happiness of catching the show and burst out together in laughter at hilarious scenes.

Wish there's a chance to chill out at some atas cafe. Sit at a quiet corner, sip hot chocolate, read up the books, have small bites, look around the relax environment and just feel contented and happy. Doing it together like we are sharing the same interest.

There're many more things that I hope to have a chance to do. Will God open a door? Thats what I have always been hoping for. But I'm slowly growing weary hoping for this simple desire.